Wanting to Quit

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Today I wanted to just quit.  Quit the insane attempt to have some sort of control over my body.  Quit trying to be responsible.  Just quit.

I convinced myself that I didn’t have time to make breakfast.  I rationalized with myself that it didn’t even matter, since the evil Count of Wii said that I had fluctuated up – up -on my weight after three consecutive flat liners.  I was going to break down the doors of Whataburger for my egg and cheese biscuit!

Then I recalled a short, annoyingly apropos passage in the 4-Hour Body.  It said, “The moment you aren’t seeing any progress, the moment you just want to quit – that’s the most important moment to stick with it.”  So basically, just push through it one more day and it will begin to pay off.  Rather than set myself back weeks for one day’s weakness, be strong for one more day.

Damn it.

I don’t like being strong.  It’s harder when you’re actually doing it.  Sure, after the fact it feels better, but in the moment, it’s hard.

I didn’t stop at Whataburger.  I didn’t.  I was strong.  Just for one more day.

God, I hope it pays off.

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